Last week I lost my older sister. She was 47 years old. She had been sick for awhile but it was still a shock to get that call from my mom in the middle of the night. Up until that point I had only lost grandparents. My grandmother when I was 5, my grandfather when I was 16, and my other grandfather at the age of 37. This is the first time I lost someone close to my age and a direct family member.
It's hard to describe the feelings you have when grieving a sibling. There's guilt, sadness, pain, anger, regret……the list goes on and on. It's been just over a week and I still have a hard time believing it. I try to be strong for my parents but sometimes I worry that I'm bottling it up and not letting myself feel what I need to feel.
If you've ever suffered a loss you may understand what I'm going through. Talking about it is awkward, people treat you differently because they aren't sure what to say or not say, and you may not feel comfortable around people for awhile. I'm already back at work and trying to be "normal" but I'm faking it.
The good news is grieving is healthy and normal. To move forward you need to feel every single emotion. The other good news is there are healthy ways to grieve that will get you through the tough times. I hope you'll take the time to read this fantastic article, whether you've experienced loss or not. It won't take the grief away but will possibly help you cope a little bit.
I'm so blessed to have many family members still in my life including a beautiful 4 year old daughter who shines a light wherever she goes. I'm also blessed to have many great memories of my sister to hold onto to and revisit when I'm feeling sad.
